This Internship is turning out to be quite challenging and growing. I’m even more excited about it than I was before, which was a lot. Initially, I had thought it would be more or less, a piece of cake. Simple pastoring. But the team dynamics, the culture of honor, confrontation, empowerment is all finding me many opportunities to grow, perhaps the word might even be grow up. Here are some ways I see myself growing a lot this year:
1. Empowerment. I’ve learned that much of my life I was raised not really having to make decisions for myself. I think this is the case in many if not most American families. Children aren’t always raised in such the empowering way that they have to “think” about their decisions, and in some cases even make important decisions for themselves. I’ve always known myself to be relatively indecisive, but never truly grasped that that may be a sign of a bigger issue. The lack of maturity in making wise decisions period. A wise decision could be anywhere as simple as what to do today or major life choices. This weakness is evident in many decisions I’ve made in the past that have caused problems for me financially, time wasting, and more. My internship mentor is very empowering and is expecting us to make smart, educated decisions as a team, and to think things through when counseling students and suggesting ideas. It’s great! I’ve already made a mistake affecting team unity and communication. Which leads me to my next area of growth.
2. Confrontation. I’ve grown in passive environments most of my life. Bethel is very confrontational (lovingly of course) in their approach to relationships. This is because there are a lot of strong and powerful personalities in the environment and more gets done when people are moving. But when people are moving they can bump into each other. When I made my first noticeable mistake team wise I approached my mentor about it and he was able to point out things I didn’t even realize I was doing in the whole process. He did it lovingly and encouragingly. This enabled me to feel empowered to clean up whatever mess I could clean up and to not make the same mistake twice. Good stuff.
3. Counseling. Wow! I’m going to be getting to do a lot of this. One on one’s with students, some it will be more like coaching and others more counseling oriented. All depending on where they are and what their needs are. This is a great growth opportunity for me in areas like wisdom, insight, and hearing God’s voice. Other things I need growth in include not thinking so much about the people I am pastoring/counseling when I’m not doing it. Apparently I can be a bit empathetic causing me to think about how I can be of help and an encouragement more than necessary. I am definitely going to need to seek advice on that one, as I’m not sure how to shut down my overly analytical and problem solving brain. :-)
4. Pastoring. I LOVE PASTORING! It has truly made me come alive. I am so excited to be doing this internship. It is really confirming the direction I’m moving and the calling on my life. I know there are areas where I must grow in this, but for now, until I discover them, I am enjoying the ride. Probably the biggest area of growth so far is time management. Not “over-pastoring” and giving myself time to re-charge. I did that today. Just had fun and took the day off. I will protect my Saturday’s as a sabbath of sorts.
All things considered, this year is apparently shaping up to be an amazing adventure. A time of activation and challenge. I contribute much of this to the amazing mentor I get to serve under, Lance. He’s carries so much wisdom and experience and the kingdom culture is really engrained in his DNA, which is what I really want for my life… I look forward, so much to gleaning from him and growing in the Lord this year.
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